Finding Your Stillness Within The Chaos
For me, inspiration can come from really anywhere - be it a conversation with a friend, watching an interview, reading a book, or just becoming still and quiet. Heck, I had the opportunity to watch a Red-tailed Hawk take a bath in my birdbath a couple weeks ago - what a magnificent sight. Totally in the moment, enjoying getting his feathers all clean, and yet always being aware of his surroundings. What an awesome sight.
I stood at the window, barely breathing because I did not want to startle him in any way - it was just too amazing to watch. Of course, I could only hold my breath for so long. I exhaled, staying very quiet, relaxing my muscles one by one as I let out my breath slowly.
As he preened and cleaned, thoroughly enjoying himself, I started noticing how my body started to let go of the tension I originally felt. My breath became more even, my feet solidly connected to the floor, my eyes became soft, my body in a relaxed stance. Most of us no longer know how to do this - to just "BE".
We try to relax by watching TV, going shopping or to the movies, doing something. We rarely fill our cup by just being present in the moment, watching - in the situation and, at the same time, detached from it.
And yet, it is one of the most vital skills we can acquire to move through life with ease, joy, grace and appreciation. It certainly is indispensable to me while working with horses.
Stillness allows me to have a conversation on a much deeper level.
A couple months ago, my sister-in-law Marcia came out to visit us. She herself does amazing work with animals and their owners by helping bridge the communication gap and therefore allowing a deep healing on so many levels. As my husband and his brother (her husband) tooled around the area to reconnect and do all the manly things, us two girls of course headed to the barn. It happened to be a rather busy day. Lessons, people getting ready for their rides, chatting and having a good time. And here the two of us were, trying to find THE STILLNESS WITHIN THE CHAOS so we could connect with my horse. Marcia doesn't always have a chance to work with horses, so it is always such a treat when she comes and we talk "shop" and learn from each other.
She said "you go ahead and start, I need to settle myself first" - they had just arrived that day and the chaos of travel needed to be taken care of. So I tuned into my horse and we quickly connected. And when I say "connected" - I mean on an energetic level. We are all a field of vibration - electrical frequency so to speak.
I am sure you have met people who immediately turned you off, some who seem nice but there is just something that has you feeling uneasy, and some you immediately jive with. That's your energy field giving you feedback on how you resonate (or not) with that particular person!
Horses are no different - each one has his or her own vibrational frequency and as a practitioner, it is vital I learn to tune into it with accuracy. Since Chase is my personal horse, it is rather easy for me to get there with him. But when I meet a new horse/client, it's a bit like finding a radio station - you know when it comes in clear and you know when it isn't. Another example would be a satellite dish - we all know what happens when there is an obstruction - no favorite TV show for you! Or it keeps dropping the signal right as you are about to get to the best part.
And so it is when we tune into our horses. As I started quieting my mind (like tuning the dial), I also grounded myself - really connecting my feet to the earth. It allows me to become a stable source of influence - like growing deep roots. Marcia did something similar by leaning against the wall of a stall - becoming steady.
Both of us tuning out all the other things going on around us, not by closing our ears but rather by drawing our focus internally. And that's when your "dial" hits the right spot. Your hands become much more sensitive to the feel of the horse's skin, its tone, temperature, texture. A change in his breath, feeling the weight shift before it happens, feeling where things are stuck and can't flow and move.
But in order to do so, I have to be still inside. In order to be able to change things for the horse, so his body can let go of tension and restriction, I have to be able to tune into what is happening right now.
There is such a great saying: you can't change what you can't acknowledge.
When you are able to connect with the horse's body on such a deep level, you are able to create change in the most profound way with seemingly very little effort.
Once Marcia felt ready, she tuned in as well. She did some amazing work. It's always great having someone else attend to your horse. We get too close, it becomes too personal, we don't stay objective. And the bonus is that I had someone else watch ME. To get feedback from another person, if their approach is different, is really priceless in this kind of work.
She was able to give me some pointers on how to effect the energy field in different ways. And her observation about my ability to get quiet was great. Her comment was: it was amazing to watch you tune into your work so quickly without allowing any of the other "stuff" to distract you! I have to say, I was quite proud of that because I have chiseled away at that goal for quite some time now. Having an active and curious mind can really get in the way when you are searching for that stillness!
So why am I writing all of this? Because our horses need us to become more quiet. We are so distracted by so many things - demands from family, work, kids, distractions from our phones and conversations. We can barely get through dinner with someone nowadays without checking our phones.
“Imagination is more important than knowledge.”
I want to invite you to play with the idea of "becoming silent" - so you can connect with your horse on the deepest level. To allow the possibility of a conversation s/he can participate in. To be able to truly connect on ALL levels - that's when you will achieve your goals. To spend time in cooperation, not competition.
Performance Through Connection - Have the conversation that matters.