A couple days ago I came across the below quote in one of the newsletters I subscribe to (The Shift Network if you must know).

“What if every relationship in your life was built on authenticity, conscious communication, and collaboration? – Nick Polizzi”

The headline was “Conscious Partnering” and without even reading the email, I knew I had to write on this. Because partnering is at the very core of my work with any animal I encounter.

It also reminded me of my own journey as a horse woman, the layers of unconscious behavior I had to shed personally to be effective in my work. My own horses were my greatest teachers for sure. So were my cats (if you want a lesson in being a perpetual student of life, adopt a cat!).

Working with horses can be extremely humbling. I remember just the other week starting to work with a new horse and the owner telling me a bit about him in addition to the information provided on the intake form. He is an older gelding and had some injuries and a recent bout of illness. I typically ask clients to complete the intake form prior to a session so I can review the information, see if there are any contra-indications to bodywork, some underlying things that may not be readily apparent, the energetic components to the animal’s personality as well as the owners, and then I clear everything out of my head again. The reason for the “forgetting everything part” is: I do not want to go into the session with any pre-conceived notions or ideas that would influence how I “read” the animal.

But in this case, the timing didn’t quite work out that way, so I had all these facts and thoughts buzzing around in my head. And being human, I fell right into the trap of “I know what this is and what I need to do”.

I spoke to my client on what I would like to accomplish and focus on and gave her my reasons. I should have known better. Horses are such tattle tales on our human foibles!

Her horse clearly had different ideas and very specific needs. Within a few minutes, I threw out my “plan” and went back to listening to him, really listening consciously. To partner with him and not just follow my own agenda. Getting out of my way was a big component of my training, I do apparently need occasional reminders that it is an integral part of my work. 

Allowing the horse a voice allows me to go deeper than I ever thought possible with the lightest of touches and a deep connecting presence. My job is to support, facilitate and assist the horse in letting go of that which does not serve. This requires listening to what he has to say. Listening enables me to see and feel past the obvious (he is tight here, he is short-strided there, he is cranky). Consciously listening and responding accordingly, I am able to show him the possibility of a different way of BEING. Physically, mentally, emotionally. And a connection is made built on trust.

In this case, I worked mostly on this horse’s head/poll and upper cervicals. And yet, the owner noticed a difference in his entire body. HE knew what was needed.

Research has shown time and again that we cannot separate the physical body from the mental and emotional component. If everything is energy, how could we even think there is a separation? While the study of the mind/body connection has mostly focused on the human species, I see parallels in our animal companions and even the wild ones all the time.

I have had the privilege of working with some animals plagued by illness, injuries, past abuse and neglect. And while the physical scars heal rather quickly, the emotional and mental ones can take some time. Survival mechanisms are set in place and can continue for a long time. Primal instincts, hard-wired behavior. How do we get past them if we impose our will upon the animal and assume we know what they need without listening?

Conscious communication allows both participants to have a voice, the ability to express themselves truthfully. This can be very disconcerting for us as humans because we are so used to being “in charge”. I know I am guilty of this myself. And I am by no means advising you to ignore dangerous behavior in your horse. Safety must always be a top priority. But I want to offer this for contemplation: Before our horses “act up, misbehave, don’t listen, ignore us” or do all the other wonderful things we say about them, what subtle signs did WE miss? Where can we become more conscious in our interaction not just with each other but with all life? Where can we let go of a story we are expected to live simply because our society expects us to? Where can WE as a human species reach higher, dive deeper, become more aware, more connected? How can we learn from our horses to be more in the moment, quiet, still, aware?

I will leave you with a quote from one of my favorite and most inspirational teachers – John F Barnes:

“Love is what interconnects us all. In every one of us, there is a very special, deep, silent, powerful space. This is what I refer to as our essence. As we release the unresolved pain and fear, and shed the obsolete belief systems that are thrust upon us, we can truly reach our full potential.”

And so can our horses.

Have a great weekend!